Sweet Home Alabama: Paint the Country Red

My apologies for the late review of Friday’s episode of Sweet Home Alabama. You’ll just have to trust me when I say I had one hell of a weekend. (Not in a crazy party girl way, but in a weird, multiple mishaps way.) But I will hopefully be chatting with Paige Duke tomorrow, so keep an eye out for that bonus post.

Well Hay There!

The episode kicked off with Shaun’s date with Paige. The city guys gave Shaun a lot of crap about his outfit, but what they don’t seem to understand yet is that Paige is a country gal. I don’t think she minded the plaid shirt and cowboy hat.

The date involved throwing around some bales of hay, which was weird, but I’ve always liked that Sweet Home Alabama dates are nice and simple. The guy and girl can actually talk and get to know each other, rather than screaming “This is so cool!” over and over while on a helicopter. Basically, Sweet Home Alabama is the sweet, rural cousin of The Bachelor. I also review The Bachelor, but more to mock it relentlessly. I actually rather enjoy this show.

So, Shaun. I’m sure we all felt for him when we watched him tell Paige about how his horse, Credit Card (fantastic name) had been stolen, and it was truly awful to hear that the jerks who stole the horse had tied it to a tree with no food or water, letting it die. Honestly, that’s disgusting.

But we have a show to discuss, so let’s talk about the rest of Paige and Shaun’s date. Paige seemed really into Shaun, but I still can’t help but think he’s too young for her. What do you guys think?

Paint-ballin’

The group date this week was a paintball competition – city vs. country, and since the guys in the house had been arguing a lot I expected it to be pretty heated. Shaun, the New Yorker I can’t stand, managed to shoot one of his own guys. I think he was too busy complaining about how he hates the outdoors to pay attention to the game. Seriously? Stop giving city dwellers a bad name. Paintball is fun!

Paige spent one round with each team, and won both times. To be fair, though, it seemed like the location had a lot to do with who won. Afterwards, Paige invited Landon to join her for a picnic date. Landon is the guy with a kid, and he seems nice enough, but as I said last week I don’t see much chemistry between him and Paige. I still think someone should put him in touch with Mandy from last season.

Landon really blew it for me, and probably anyone else who’s seen The Bachelor, when he said he was there to “defend her [Paige] and protect her heart.” Oh no. No one let him go get a tattoo of that, OK?

Suit Up!

The last date of the week went to David, the commercial broker from Chicago. I had a feeling the date wouldn’t go well. Last week I was annoyed when David didn’t take his sunglasses off to meet Paige, and he ALWAYS wears a suit. It’s great that he brought her flowers and all, but the guy just reeked of trying to hard.

The date was a disaster. Listen up, fellas: You need to LISTEN on dates. Yeah, you want the girl to get to know what you’re all about. But get to know her, too! David talked Paige’s ear off, droning on about himself and his job. He had no idea she was having a terrible time. Pathetic.

Bye Bye, Boys

This week Paige had to say goodbye to three guys. First up was Severn, the hairstylist/purse designer. It was pretty obvious from the start that he wouldn’t be around long. But hey, at least Paige scored a free clutch.

Next, Paige said goodbye to a country guy – Seth Tidwell. This one surprised me. We barely saw the dude, but he was one of the better looking guys on the show, he was a country guy, owns his own company and has a dog. It seems like there would be enough common ground there to keep him around, but Seth was quick to agree that there was no spark. Were you guys surprised Seth didn’t last longer?

Finally, Paige sent David home. After such a dud of a date, that was really a no-brainer.

Other guys that stood out this week, though not in a good way, were Andy and Jeremy. Jeremy is just an idiot – who crushes up crackers and throws them in someone’s hair? A toddler? Even I, as a feisty two year-old, had the chutzpah to (allegedly! I’ll deny til death!) cut my sister’s hair. Crackers? That’s small beans. Andy didn’t come across much better, since we saw a montage of all his boozing and a few of the guys suggested he’s just there to party. Last week I listed him as one of my favorites – after all he’s from the South, is handsome and wore a bow-tie. It’s as though he was cast specifically to please me. But he just seemed like a sloppy drunk this week. We’ll see if he can redeem himself.

Next week it looks like Jeremiah will get a date, which I’m excited to see. I had him pegged from the start as someone who seems nice, and when he gave Paige his bandana during paintball we saw that even more. It also seems like the city vs. country conflicts will keep heating up. It certainly seems like guys have more arguments on this show than the girls do. It’ll be interesting to see how those tensions come out when Paige takes all the guys on a camping trip in the next episode.

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About Jill

Pop culture junkie and TV aficionado. I write sharp and snarky TV recaps at www.couchtimewithjill.com
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