The Bachelor – A little song, a little dance…

Juan PabloHappy Monday! If you caught The Bachelor last night, then you know how dull it was. If you didn’t, you’re lucky – and I can easily fill you in right now.

This week Juan Pablo and his girlfriends traveled to Seoul, South Korea for two group dates and a single one-on-one. We’re definitely not yet at the point where I can identify all the women on each group date.

Date #1 – Step Up, K-Pop Edition

The group date was dancing for a Korean pop girl group, because this is The Bachelor and it’s ridiculous. Kat took every opportunity to tell everyone that she used to be a dancer and Nikki swayed awkwardly in the background. Frankly, I thought Nikki came out of that portion of the date looking better.

But at the cocktnikkiail party, all Nikki wanted to do was crap on Kat. The other girls were not happy about it. But when Nikki had alone time with Juan Pablo, she was just a sweet, blond baby nurse.

There’s definitely some weird judginess going on here over whether women thing that other women would be a good mother. That makes me uncomfortable, since most of them barely know one another. Sure, Nikki seemed like a bit of a gossip. But does she seem as negative as the other girls describe her? Not really. She’s certainly not “Well there’s someone who should never reproduce” material.

Date #2 – Sharleen

sharleenMan, could Sharleen be any less into Juan Pablo? She described Juan Pablo as “not bland” and “more fun than expected”. What high compliments!

Sharleen froze up when Juan Pablo asked how many kids she wants, and he asked more than once. Sharleen knew that the other girls were giving “I want three kids yesterday” answers. Hers was more complicated, but honest. Juan Pablo gave her the rose. And he called her classy again.

Date #3 -K-Pop Idol

For the second group date, Juan Pablo and some women sang karaoke, drank lemonade from bags, and had fish eat dead skin off their feet. Ewwwwwww.

claireClare told Juan Pablo that she didn’t want to eat octopus, so naturally Juan Pablo sought some out. “Oh Clare, you just made the worst mistake of your life,” he mischievously told the camera. Ugh fine I’ll admit it, I kind of dig this guy. He’s funny.

Renee and Andi spent some decent time with Juan Pablo during the group date, but the Awkward Award went to Lauren. She asked Juan Pablo to dance with no music and then asked him for a kiss and he declined! What a snub. He used his daughter as an excuse, which is hilarious because he’s been kissing other gals like crazy.

Clare told Juan Pablo that she threw up the octopus in her mouth and swallowed it. Juan Pablo had said he wouldn’t kiss anyone, but she was “sexy and hot”. Yep, nothing like the taste of puke! Juan Pablo couldn’t resist. But the rose! The rose went to Andi.

Cocktail Party and Rose Ceremony

At the cocktail party, Nikki rubbed people the wrong way by taking solo time with Juan Pablo when she already had a rose. Yawn! If Nikki is meant to be our villain this season, she is not catty enough. The “drama” between Nikki and Clare almost put me to sleep.

Elise and Lauren didn’t get roses this week. Elise never really had much of a chance to talk to Juan Pablo, did she? She left a hot mess, practically flashing the folks at home in two different ways. And Lauren, well, after that group date this was no surprise.

Next they’re all going to Vietnam. Pretty! These girls don’t deserve this.

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About Jill

Pop culture junkie and TV aficionado. I write sharp and snarky TV recaps at www.couchtimewithjill.com
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One Response to The Bachelor – A little song, a little dance…

  1. Dana says:

    Jill, it’s sad that you only review reality shows on a regular basis anymore as there is not much mystery to them and nothing to really analyze. I can understand how they are easier to write because you can write as you go, but IMO it is the other shows where you really show your talent. I guess I have to rely on Alan Sepinwall and the AV Club. :-( Miss your other reviews.

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